Emotional Intelligence ...
Went for an interesting talk today about Emotional Intelligence which is simply a bunch of 'non-cognitive capabilities, competencies and skill that can influence our abilities to succeed in coping with the environment demands and pressures'. That's the definition by Reuven Bar-On. Anyways, what I learnt was that there are five realms that constitute Emotional Intelligence according to Bar-On. The five are: intrapersonal, interpersonal, stress management, adaptablity which will affect general mood and then affect our performance. They have a tool to assess one's Emotional Intelligence and I guess it is something I am keen to try out.
One part of the lady's presentation that got me thinking. It's under STRESS MANAGEMENT and one of the sub component for that is IMPULSE CONTROL and I don't need any test to tell me that I am super weak in THAT area. The researchers did a Marshmallow Test where they gave poor 4 year old kids a marshmallow and these kids were told that if they waited (thus have high impulse control) they would get TWO extra marshmallows to enjoy afters.
And yes, many caved in and ate the marshmallows and a few even cried cuz they couldn't bear to wait but wanted the extra marshmallows (battle within?). I mean who is cruel enough to put kids through such traumatic experiments but that's another post altogether. And it seems that kids with high impulse control supposedly did much better academically.
I have horrible impulse control. Loved it when Oprah said that those of us with weight management problems are all too aware of this...OH YES!!! We didn't get to our current state by staying away from the chocolates and yummy fried food *laughs*
Another area where I have no control would be shopping. Today, I was at Holland V and told myself NO KOKESHI DOLLS. Went in the shop, picked up a few but placed them back and walked out of the shop and straight into the shoe shop that was opposite and walked out of there with three pairs of shoes. Do I need the shoes? Probably not. Do I want the shoes? Yes I want the shoes.
I know guys constantly wonder:
Question 1: Why do we need so many shoes for?
Answer: just cuz (same answer for clothes, handbags and jewellery).
Question 2: How many shoes would be considered enough for a woman?
Answer: There is no such thing as ENOUGH shoes (or clothes, handbags or jewellery)
But don't quote me cuz this is something which is very me and a perhaps a handful thousand other women out there.
Am sure if there is a help group for shoppacholic, I would qualify. I KNOW I shouldn't be shopping cuz I get things that I don't need and can't afford. But I LOVE shopping and it relaxes me (until the bill comes *grins*).
Simple solution would be to just stop ya? Not so simple *shakes head* And do I want to stop all this frivalous spending? Not just yet but maybe I might consider cutting down. THAT would be a good start. Am a realist. Not shopping at all will just lead to a build up and when I eventually shop after all that self-deprivation, will probably overspend big time *laughs* Am dead serious!
Anyways, just me rambling on and on about shopping. Will think about the EQ assessment though. Might be something useful for self development. Let's see....
posted by Me, Myself n I at 9:30 am
Went for an interesting talk today about Emotional Intelligence which is simply a bunch of 'non-cognitive capabilities, competencies and skill that can influence our abilities to succeed in coping with the environment demands and pressures'. That's the definition by Reuven Bar-On. Anyways, what I learnt was that there are five realms that constitute Emotional Intelligence according to Bar-On. The five are: intrapersonal, interpersonal, stress management, adaptablity which will affect general mood and then affect our performance. They have a tool to assess one's Emotional Intelligence and I guess it is something I am keen to try out.
One part of the lady's presentation that got me thinking. It's under STRESS MANAGEMENT and one of the sub component for that is IMPULSE CONTROL and I don't need any test to tell me that I am super weak in THAT area. The researchers did a Marshmallow Test where they gave poor 4 year old kids a marshmallow and these kids were told that if they waited (thus have high impulse control) they would get TWO extra marshmallows to enjoy afters.
And yes, many caved in and ate the marshmallows and a few even cried cuz they couldn't bear to wait but wanted the extra marshmallows (battle within?). I mean who is cruel enough to put kids through such traumatic experiments but that's another post altogether. And it seems that kids with high impulse control supposedly did much better academically.
I have horrible impulse control. Loved it when Oprah said that those of us with weight management problems are all too aware of this...OH YES!!! We didn't get to our current state by staying away from the chocolates and yummy fried food *laughs*
Another area where I have no control would be shopping. Today, I was at Holland V and told myself NO KOKESHI DOLLS. Went in the shop, picked up a few but placed them back and walked out of the shop and straight into the shoe shop that was opposite and walked out of there with three pairs of shoes. Do I need the shoes? Probably not. Do I want the shoes? Yes I want the shoes.
I know guys constantly wonder:
Question 1: Why do we need so many shoes for?
Answer: just cuz (same answer for clothes, handbags and jewellery).
Question 2: How many shoes would be considered enough for a woman?
Answer: There is no such thing as ENOUGH shoes (or clothes, handbags or jewellery)
But don't quote me cuz this is something which is very me and a perhaps a handful thousand other women out there.
Am sure if there is a help group for shoppacholic, I would qualify. I KNOW I shouldn't be shopping cuz I get things that I don't need and can't afford. But I LOVE shopping and it relaxes me (until the bill comes *grins*).
Simple solution would be to just stop ya? Not so simple *shakes head* And do I want to stop all this frivalous spending? Not just yet but maybe I might consider cutting down. THAT would be a good start. Am a realist. Not shopping at all will just lead to a build up and when I eventually shop after all that self-deprivation, will probably overspend big time *laughs* Am dead serious!
Anyways, just me rambling on and on about shopping. Will think about the EQ assessment though. Might be something useful for self development. Let's see....
One part of the lady's presentation that got me thinking. It's under STRESS MANAGEMENT and one of the sub component for that is IMPULSE CONTROL and I don't need any test to tell me that I am super weak in THAT area. The researchers did a Marshmallow Test where they gave poor 4 year old kids a marshmallow and these kids were told that if they waited (thus have high impulse control) they would get TWO extra marshmallows to enjoy afters.
And yes, many caved in and ate the marshmallows and a few even cried cuz they couldn't bear to wait but wanted the extra marshmallows (battle within?). I mean who is cruel enough to put kids through such traumatic experiments but that's another post altogether. And it seems that kids with high impulse control supposedly did much better academically.
I have horrible impulse control. Loved it when Oprah said that those of us with weight management problems are all too aware of this...OH YES!!! We didn't get to our current state by staying away from the chocolates and yummy fried food *laughs*
Another area where I have no control would be shopping. Today, I was at Holland V and told myself NO KOKESHI DOLLS. Went in the shop, picked up a few but placed them back and walked out of the shop and straight into the shoe shop that was opposite and walked out of there with three pairs of shoes. Do I need the shoes? Probably not. Do I want the shoes? Yes I want the shoes.
I know guys constantly wonder:
Question 1: Why do we need so many shoes for?
Answer: just cuz (same answer for clothes, handbags and jewellery).
Question 2: How many shoes would be considered enough for a woman?
Answer: There is no such thing as ENOUGH shoes (or clothes, handbags or jewellery)
But don't quote me cuz this is something which is very me and a perhaps a handful thousand other women out there.
Am sure if there is a help group for shoppacholic, I would qualify. I KNOW I shouldn't be shopping cuz I get things that I don't need and can't afford. But I LOVE shopping and it relaxes me (until the bill comes *grins*).
Simple solution would be to just stop ya? Not so simple *shakes head* And do I want to stop all this frivalous spending? Not just yet but maybe I might consider cutting down. THAT would be a good start. Am a realist. Not shopping at all will just lead to a build up and when I eventually shop after all that self-deprivation, will probably overspend big time *laughs* Am dead serious!
Anyways, just me rambling on and on about shopping. Will think about the EQ assessment though. Might be something useful for self development. Let's see....
posted by Me, Myself n I at 9:30 am
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